Hi, it’s me… your 12 year old self. Remember me?
I know you’re super busy and all but I’m the one who used to run til my lungs were on fire when we played tag down at the field. Remember me?
I used to throw my whole heart and soul into just about everything. I’m the one who had all those plans and schemes and dreams. Remember me?
I was always making things up. Remember when I tried to build that go cart and Sammy and I pushed it down the hill and the front tire flew off? Remember that? I laughed so hard I started hiccupping and then it turned into snorts and then we all laughed so hard it hurt.
I can see that you’ve gotten all grown up and fancy now. I see you with your friends and I watch you at work. It seems like you’re always rushing around.
You must be really important and that’s super cool but I’ve noticed that sometimes you have a hard time catching your breath. I’ve noticed that sometimes you don’t even really look at people or listen to them—even the ones you really love like your daughter.
Even on vacations it doesn’t seem like you’re ever really really happy and that seems kind of strange and a little sad. Plus you hardly ever laugh, and you used to laugh all the time.
Maybe you and I could be friends again. I mean I know I’m not as fancy or smart as you or anything but I have to say I think I have a lot more fun than you do and I think you could too again if you wanted to.
I wish we could be friends again. Maybe we could even play tag again and run until we just threw ourselves down on the ground and looked up at the sky and made up imaginary animals with all the clouds and tell stories like we used to.
Maybe we could draw and make collages and sculptures in the back yard. Maybe your daughter would like to play too.
I know it probably feels a little strange me telling you this. After all I’m only 12. I just think you’d feel so much better if you could remember what it was like to hide behind the tree like you did when you were playing with Jessie and she was it and your heart was thumping and you were hoping she wouldn’t find you.
Or when we’d lay on our backs with Roselyn and watch the stars up in the sky. Or that time when we dug and dug a big hole in the back yard because we thought we could build a tunnel.
I could show you how to feel like that again—how to feel so excited like at the beginning of summer vacation. I could show you how to stare up at the sky and say hi to the stars. I could show you how to play with a water hose while you were cleaning the driveway. I could even show you how to have fun while your cleaning the house.
I hope we can be friends again.
Me—your 12 year old self
Have an absolutely brilliant day.
With showers of love and light,
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©2016 Rhégina Sinozich